Why Self-Esteem Isn’t Just a Buzzword (And How to Start Building It Today)
- Women Who Slay
- Oct 8
- 2 min read
Let’s talk about self-esteem. Not the filtered, pretty, Instagrammable version. The real kind, the kind that keeps you grounded when life gets messy, your plans fall apart, or someone questions your worth. Self-esteem isn’t just a trendy concept, it’s not just another feel-good phrase thrown around in self-help books, it’s the foundation of how you treat yourself, how you let others treat you, and how you show up in your life.
And yet… most of us were never taught how to build it.
What Self-Esteem Really Is
Self-esteem is your inner belief that you are worthy, capable, and enough, regardless of how productive, polished, or perfect you are.
It’s:
✦Saying no when something doesn’t feel aligned.
✦Letting go of comparison and honouring your own path.
✦Trusting your voice, even when it shakes.
✦Not shrinking yourself to make others more comfortable.
It’s not about having everything figured out. It’s about knowing your worth, even when things feel uncertain.
Why So Many Women Struggle with It
If you've ever felt like you had to earn your worth, through achievements, relationships, or looking a certain way, you’re not alone.
From childhood, many of us were taught:
✦To be liked before we’re respected.
✦To be “nice” before we’re honest.
✦To put others first, even at the expense of ourselves.
So we grow up second-guessing our worth. We look for validation, we silence our needs and we become experts at doubting ourselves.
But here’s what we at women who slay want you to hear loud and clear:
You don’t have to perform to be enough. You already are.
How to Start Building Real Self-Esteem Today
1. Start Noticing Your Inner Critic
That voice that tells you you’re not good enough? It’s not your truth, it’s your fear. Start catching it in the act. Ask yourself: "Would I speak to a friend this way?"
2. Celebrate Small Wins
Did you set a boundary today? Show up when you wanted to hide? Say yes to yourself? That counts. Self-esteem grows when you acknowledge your effort, not just your results.
3. Come Home to Your Truth
Every day, ask: "What do I need today to honour my worth?" It might be rest, movement, saying no, saying yes, or taking up more space. The more you listen to your truth, the stronger your self-esteem becomes.
Want to Go Deeper?
We wrote You’re Enough: A Real-World Guide to Building Unshakable Self-Esteem, along with the Deeper Dive Companion Workbook and the 30-Day Live It Planner, because we know what it feels like to live in doubt, shrink your light, and question your value.
This book is a love letter to the version of you who’s tired of pretending. Inside, you’ll find soul-deep reflections, and practical tools to help you reconnect with your voice, rebuild your confidence, and finally own your worth.
Grab your copy here:
You don’t need to be more perfect, more successful, or more confident to be worthy. You just need to remember who you are.
You are already enough and now it’s time to start living like it
By|womenwhoslay
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