Build Your Own Damn Table! Why You Should Stop Waiting for a Seat

We’ve all heard the saying, “If they don’t give you a seat at the table, bring your own chair.” But what if you stopped waiting for their table altogether and built your own instead?

In a world where opportunities often seem limited to the “chosen few,” waiting to be invited, noticed, or accepted can keep you stuck in a loop of frustration and self-doubt. Whether it’s in business, your career, or creative pursuits, the truth is simple: you don’t need permission to show up. You don’t need validation to lead. And you don’t need someone else’s platform to make an impact.

You have everything you need to build something powerful - your own table.

1. The Waiting Game Is a Trap

So many talented, intelligent women waste years waiting for recognition, hoping someone will finally say, “We see you.” But the truth is: the world is full of people who won’t see you, simply because they weren’t meant to. Their table wasn’t built for you, it was built for them. And that’s okay.

When you wait for an invitation, you give away your power. You hand control of your destiny to someone else’s decision. But when you build your own table, you take that power back. You stop asking, “Can I?” and start saying, “Watch me.”

2. Your Voice Deserves Space - Not Permission

Your voice, your story, and your ideas hold weight. You don’t need a seat at someone else’s table to be heard, especially when you can create your own space where your voice leads the conversation.

Start that podcast. Launch that brand. Write that book. Create that community.

When you build your own table, you create a platform not just for yourself, but for others who have been overlooked, underestimated, or dismissed. You shift from seeking inclusion to creating opportunity.

3. Building Teaches You Power, Patience & Purpose

There’s something powerful about being the architect of your own vision. When you build your own table, from scratch, you learn resilience. You discover what you’re capable of when no one is clapping yet. You learn to clap for yourself.

Yes, it’s harder. Yes, it’s slower, but every step of that journey strengthens your character. It gives you wisdom that can’t be taught, only lived.

And when people finally notice? You’ll know that every brick, every inch of that table was built by you.

4. Your Table Becomes a Movement

When you stop chasing acceptance and start creating impact, something magical happens, people start showing up for your table.

Your story inspires others to do the same. Your courage gives others permission to dream bigger. Your success proves that power doesn’t come from sitting with them, it comes from believing in yourself enough to start something new.

This is how movements begin. One woman deciding she’s done waiting.

5. You Were Never Meant to Fit In

Stop waiting to be chosen. Stop hoping for inclusion. Stop asking for permission to shine. You are the table. You are the movement. You are the brand.

You were meant to stand out. And sometimes standing out means walking away from what everyone else is doing and creating something no one’s seen before.

So stop waiting to be chosen. Stop hoping for inclusion. Stop asking for permission to shine.

You are the table. You are the movement. You are the brand. Start building, Queen - the world is ready for what only you can bring.

Your table is waiting for you to create it.

If you’ve ever felt left out, underestimated, or invisible, this is your reminder that you don’t need a seat to prove your worth. Build something so bold, so authentic, and so magnetic that they have no choice but to notice.

Your table is waiting for you to create it.

By| Sasha Shantel

@womenwhoslay